A Miley Cyrus AOL Chatroom Goes To A McDonald’s Drive Thru (A Play In One Act)
Spring, 2008. Anytown, USA.
A 2003 Dodge Minivan with a “Soccer Mom” bumper sticker pulls up in line at a McDonalds drive-thru. Inside the van are hungry, Miley Cyrus fans composed from various AOL Chatrooms.
Curtain Opens
ashleytisdale217 (in passenger seat, turns up the car stereo to and sings along): Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha Sha!
McDonalds Drive-Thru Speaker: Welcome to McDonald’s! Can I take your order?
picklee (still screaming along to the music): SHAAAA- TUPPPP!
McDonalds Drive-Thru Speaker: Can you please turn your music down? I can’t hear you. Order whenever you’re ready.
I_Am_The_Morgan: No offense, picklee, but it doesn’t count if one person says it more than once in the same post.
Oh yeah. And……
SHA
McDonalds Drive-Thru Speaker: If you ladies aren’t going to order can you please get out of the drive thru line. We are very busy today.
Happiness And Disaster: 
It’s called getting your point across. Try it sometimes
McDonalds Drive-Thru Speaker: Excuse me? I think I did just get my point across. Please order or leave the line.
Muzick_Lvr: On Youtube this one kid had like Miley Cyrus everywhere and when I say everywhere I mean everywhere!!!
McDonalds Drive-Thru Speaker: Seriously, this is the last time I am going to ask you to order or leave the line, otherwise I’m going to get my manager.
txhurletbsx: OMG! LOLZ!
McDonalds Drive-Thru Speaker: That’s it, I warned you!
antimarthie: I like Cry Me a River waaaaay better than 7 things
McDonalds Drive-Thru Speaker: Ok. Now we’re getting somewhere. Did you say you wanted seven things? Or a #7?
RomeosJuliet21: WTF?
McDonalds Drive-Thru Speaker: Listen. This is how it works. You look at the pictures of the meals and you tell me the number of the picture next to the meal you want. So you want a #7? Anything else? Anything to drink?
zydcomic2003: All those pictures you mentioned are taken before the media frenzy for her vf photoes.(which began at the end of April 2008)
The ones with the guy are taken early this year, leaked in April, others should be taken back in 2007. Her recent look is much different from those photoes.
So your statement is false.
McDonalds Drive-Thru Speaker: Look, it’s not false. See the pictures on the board? All you have to do is tell me what you want to order, I’ll make it for you and then you can get out of here. Have you girls really watched so much television that your brains have literally turned into mush?
MadAsRabbits: Hannah Montana. I personally don’t like the tv show. But, that doesn’t change the fact that I like Miley. People say “I like Hannah Montana better than Miley Cyrus” or vice versa. To that sentence I say: “WTF!? They’re the same person! The only diffrence is the wig!!”. Then I think and say “Oh, they are talking about the tv show” and completely made a fool out of myself but i’ll get over it……….
McDonalds Drive-Thru Speaker: That’s it, I’m getting my manager.
Hey. Alright. Bye.
iDontKnowAnyOfYou said this on July 3, 2008 at 12:55 am |
No i love miley i love her wil somone pleace tel her my name is kevin my number is 0832478205 pleace leave a mesage
Kevin said this on July 9, 2008 at 12:31 pm |
miley cyrus is a bitch and a hoe she does pentys scandal and she only has fans ages 10 and down
jenna said this on July 26, 2008 at 12:03 pm |